Ghosts of Girlfriends Past (2009)

Simply a shameless twist to a timeless Dickens classic, stripped of its meat and left to entertain the hounds with nothing but a loose plot, and looser morals.

Mark Waters (Just Like Heaven, Freaky Friday) directs the story of Conner Mead (Matthew McConaughey, Fool's Gold, Failure to Launch), a pretentious man’s man, lover of all, love of none. He’s a highly sought after and respected celebrity photographer, known almost as much for his sexual prowess as his shutter skills. On a trip back to his Uncle's (Michael Douglas) mansion for his little brother’s wedding, he tries to spread his contagion of anti-love and marriage amongst the crowd, even giving his brother his keys to make the escape. Ending the night in a drunken stupor, he’s visited by his diseased Uncle who informs him he’ll be visited by three ghosts representing his past, present and future girlfriends, to show him the error of his mega-bachelor ways and show him what he’s been missing his whole life, Jenny (Jennifer Garner, Juno, Elektra). The supporting cast (Breckin Meyer, Emma Stone) ride Conner the whole way while he considers the warnings brought before him as he tries to run from his past.

Maybe you women aren’t getting tired of it, but I sure am. Surely Matt's got more substance than this and can peg roles outside of being the biggest dick in the world that seems to be a woman magnet *cough* Fool's Gold and Failure to Launch *cough*, but he does it well, and studios know he sells. Too bad Jennifer Garner looked like crap in this movie comparatively. The movie itself, less than stellar acting and juvenile humor aside, I could have done without it. The only character I actually liked from the whole movie was Emma Stone (Zombieland, Superbad), she’s great. Funny, spunky, spot on. The movie was just soulless I guess is was I’m really getting at. It hoped to bank off of the classic Scrooge-isms, and really, it tried hard. Just wasn’t for me I guess, but I really could see plenty of you McConaughey chick flick fans will love every bit of it. It does get rather sappy, but you’d have to believe someone like the character could really change like that to even consider shedding a tear.

6.1/10

Rated: PG-13
100 mins