Horsemen (2009)

A busy father and dedicated detective investigates a series of murders that come way to close to home. "Four victims. Four painful secrets."

Dennis Quaid (Vantage Point, The Rookie) stars in this Jonas Åkerlund directed thriller about an overworked, yet dedicated detective named Aidan Breslin whom, since his wife's' passing, has spent more time behind his desk than in his two sons' lives. Aidan and his partner "Stingray", (Clifton Collins Jr.) head up an investigation of brutally violent, masochistic murders which in turn lead them to a group who proudly proclaim that, "We Are The Nothing." All of the murders point to ritual killings in the name of the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse, and they are running out of time to save victim number four. A superb supporting cast of familiar faces (Ziyi Zhang, Patrick Fugit, and Eric Balfour) help guide you through the intertwined lives of the killers and victims alike as it all comes full circle back on Detective Breslin's doorstep.

You know, it's really great to read so many bad reviews, and then see a movie, and feel completely the opposite way. To be fair, the was no blockbuster, and well... Quaid is looking pretty haggard and seems to have taken a step back in the acting department, but on the whole, relatively enjoyable. I mean come on, you have the cute ninja chick from Rush Hour in it, though you would swear she stepped on set right after her English lessons. And would you believe Patrick Fugit, yeah him, the squirrely kid who got to see Kate Hudson naked in Almost Famous... he's in it, and wow, give that guy the "Suicide of The Year" award! I know in my previous review I had high praises for Clifton Collins... a shame I feel he sucked ass in this flick. If you like thrilling, crime movies that border on the grotesque (SAW, Seven), where there is a deeper meaning to it all, I think you'll enjoy this. The twist at the end is worth watching anyhow.

6.1/10

Rated: R
90 mins

G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra (2009)

Paramount delivers an action packed thrill ride that should quench the thirst of salivating fanboys and secure the franchise for future development. True to its roots and audience, this film delivers what viewers should expect from a movie based an 80's cartoon series and iconic action figure.

"When all else fails, they don't!" That's the ego driven mantra of the world's most elite group of special operatives known only as G.I. Joe. Stephen Sommers (The Mummy, Van Helsing) directs this live action adaptation of every young boys cherished action adventure toys. Channing Tatum (Public Enemies, Step Up) and Marlon Wayons (Little Man, White Chicks) star as Duke and Ripcord, two US Army hotshots who inadvertently team up with G.I. Joe after their tasking to transport a sensitive package for NATO goes awry. Along with an amazing supporting cast (Sienna Miller, Dennis Quaid, Rachel Nichols, and Joseph Gordon-Levitt) the new "Joes" enter into a battle an international force lead by the jaded James McCullen (Christopher Eccleston), to reclaim their package of warheads and save the world from a major catastrophe. They'll be up against the the cunningly beautiful Baroness (Sienna Miller) and heaps of nanotech controlled soldiers as they fight their way to McCullen and his scientific mastermind known only as, The Doctor.

This is another action flick that was taken way too seriously by "real" critics. They apparently missed that this movie delivered exactly what it should have. It's a mans man movie with plenty of gratuitous, nonsensical, over the top action... it's G.I. Joe for eff's sake, what more do you want!? In lieu of that point, there was not much character development, but any fan of the cartoon would have no problems connecting the dots, and any 8-14 year old wouldn't care about that anyway. The intertwined relationships between characters on both sides of the war was especially interesting, and the action sequences along with eh special effects were as good as they get. Surprisingly, Wayons wasn't too much of a distraction from the rest of the film like I thought he might be. His humor fit in well, I was pleased. The acting is par for the course, nothing great, and the story flowed well. Even the brief cameo by Brendan Fraser was as fun as it was unexpected.

If you watch this movie expecting some deep, moody war drama, think again. It's a no brains, all brawn super action flick, simple as that. Expect that from the beginning and you'll be sure to enjoy this as much as any other mid to late 20 year old.

8.2/10

Rated: PG-13
118 mins